The narrator experiences an overwhelming sense of rage that feels uncontrollable, generating a desire to unleash that anger physically. This internal struggle makes it difficult for them to maintain their composure as a person. Their feelings are so intense that they long for any outlet for their frustration.

In a moment of confrontation, the narrator's anger is directed towards Matthew, who is present in the room. They feel a need to silence him, reflecting their inability to manage the emotional turmoil brewing inside. The situation illustrates the depth of their inner conflict and the desperation to channel their pent-up feelings into action.