The character reflects on a pivotal choice in his life, pondering what could have been if he had married a certain woman instead of choosing to wander aimlessly. This regret is accompanied by the realization that his current situation is less than ideal. Despite this awareness, he feels a profound sense of weariness that overshadows any fear or desire to change his circumstances.
Ultimately, he recognizes that life hasn't gone according to plan, leading him to accept the unfairness of his situation. This acceptance comes from a deep exhaustion, suggesting that the struggles he faces have drained him of the will to fight against his fate, leaving him resigned to his path.