Book: Almost Heaven
Quotes of Book: Almost Heaven
Miss Lucinda Throckmorton-Jones, former paid companion to several of the most successful debutantes of prior seasons, came to Havenhurst to fill the position of Elizabeth's duenna. A woman of fifty with wiry gray hair she scraped back into a bun and the posture of a ramrod, she had a permanently pinched face, as if she smelled something disagreeable but was too well-bred to remark upon it. In addition to the duenna's daunting physical appearance, Elizabeth observed shortly after their first meeting that Miss Throckmorton-Jones possessed an astonishing ability to sit serenely for hours without twitching so much as a finger.Elizabeth refused to be put off by her stony demeanor and set about finding a way to thaw her. Teasingly, she called her "Lucy," and when the casually affectionate nickname won a thunderous frown from the lady, Elizabeth tried to find a different means. She discovered it very soon: A few days after Lucinda came to live at Havenhurst the duenna discovered her curled up in a chair in Havenhurt's huge library, engrossed in a book. "You enjoy reading?" Lucinda had said gruffly-and with surprise-as she noted the gold embossed title on the volume."Yes," Elizabeth had assured her, smiling. "Do you?""Have you read Christopher Marlowe?""Yes, but I prefer Shakespeare."Thereafter it became their policy each night after supper to debate the merits of the individual books they'd read. Before long Elizabeth realized that she'd won the duenna's reluctant respect. It was impossible to be certain she'd won Lucinda's affection, for the only emotion the lady ever displayed was anger, and that only once, at a miscreant tradesman in the village. Even so, it was a display Elizabeth never forgot. Wielding her ever-present umbrella, Lucinda had advanced on the hapless man, backing him clear around his own shop, while from her lips in a icy voice poured the most amazing torrent of eloquent, biting fury Elizabeth had ever heard."My temper," Lucinda had primly informed her-by way of apology, Elizabeth supposed-"is my shortcoming."Privately, Elizabeth thought Lucy must bottle up all her emotions inside herself as she sat perfectly still on sofas and chairs, for years at a time, until it finally exploded like one of those mountains she'd read about that poured forth molten rock when the pressure finally reached a peak. book-quoteIn the center of the room Elizabeth stood stock still, clasping and unclasping her hands, watching the handle turn, unable to breathe with the tension. The door swung open, admitting a blast of frigid air and a tall, broad-shouldered man who glanced at Elizabeth in the firelight and said, "Henry, it wasn't necess-"Ian broke off, the door still open, staring at what he momentarily thought was a hallucination, a trick of the flames dancing in the fireplace, and then he realized the vision was real: Elizabeth was standing perfectly still, looking at him. And lying at her feet was a young Labrador retriever.Trying to buy time, Ian turned around and carefully closed the door as if latching it with precision were the most paramount thing in his life, while he tried to decide whether she'd looked happy or not to see him. In the long lonely nights without her, he'd rehearsed dozens of speeches to her-from stinging lectures to gentle discussions. Now, when the time was finally here, he could not remember one damn word of any of them.Left with no other choice, he took the only neutral course available. Turning back to the room, Ian looked at the Labrador. "Who's this?" he asked, walking forward and crouching down to pet the dog, because he didn't know what the hell to say to his wife.Elizabeth swallowed her disappointment as he ignored her and stroked the Labrador's glossy black head. "I-I call her Shadow."The sound of her voice was so sweet, Ian almost pulled her down into his arms. Instead, he glanced at her, thinking it encouraging she'd named her dog after his. "Nice name."Elizabeth bit her lip, trying to hide her sudden wayward smile. "Original, too."The smile hit Ian like a blow to the head, snapping him out of his untimely and unsuitable preoccupation with the dog. Straightening, he backed up a step and leaned his hip against the table, his weight braced on his opposite leg.Elizabeth instantly noticed the altering of his expression and watched nervously as he crossed his arms over his chest, watching her, his face inscrutable. "You-you look well," she said, thinking he looked unbearably handsome."I'm perfectly fine," he assured her, his gaze level. "Remarkably well, actually, for a man who hasn't seen the sun shine in more than three months, or been able to sleep without drinking a bottle of brandy."His tone was so frank and unemotional that Elizabeth didn't immediately grasp what he was saying. When she did, tears of joy and relief sprang to her eyes as he continued: "I've been working very hard. Unfortunately, I rarely get anything accomplished, and when I do, it's generally wrong. All things considered, I would say that I'm doing very well-for a man who's been more than half dead for three months."Ian saw the tears shimmering in her magnificent eyes, and one of them traced unheeded down her smooth cheek.With a raw ache in his voice he said, "If you would take one step forward, darling, you could cry in my arms. And while you do, I'll tell you how sorry I am for everything I've done-" Unable to wait, Ian caught her, pulling her tightly against him. "And when I'm finished," he whispered hoarsely as she wrapped her arms around him and wept brokenly, "you can help me find a way to forgive myself."Tortured by her tears, he clasped her tighter and rubbed his jaw against her temple, his voice a ravaged whisper: "I'm sorry," he told her. He cupped her face between his palms, tipping it up and gazing into her eyes, his thumbs moving over her wet cheeks. "I'm sorry." Slowly, he bent his head, covering her mouth with his. "I'm so damned book-quoteWhat is the most beautiful place you've ever seen?"Dragging his gaze from the beauty of the gardens, Ian looked down at the beauty beside him. "Any place," he said huskily, "were you are."He saw the becoming flush of embarrassed pleasure that pinkened her cheeks, but when she spoke her voice was rueful. "You don't have to say such things to me, you know-I'll keep our bargain.""I know you will," he said, trying not to overwhelm her with avowals of love she wouldn't yet believe. With a grin he added, "Besides, as it turned out after our bargaining session, the one who's governed by all the conditions, not you."Her sideways glance was filled with laughter. "You were much too lenient at times, you know. Toward the end I was asking for concessions just to see how far you'd go."Ian, who had been multiplying his fortune for the last four years by buying shipping and import-export companies, as well as sundry others, was regarded as an extremely tough negotiator. He heard her announcement with a smile of genuine surprise. "You gave me the impression that every single concession was of paramount importance to you, and that if I didn't agree, you might call the whole thing off."She nodded with satisfaction. "I rather that was how I ought to do it. Why are you laughing?""Because," he admitted, chuckling, "obviously I was not in my best form yesterday. In addition to completely misreading your feelings, I managed to buy a house on Promenade Street for which I will undoubtedly pay five times its worth.""Oh, I don't think so," she said, and, as if she was embarrassed and needed a way to avoid meeting his gaze, she reached up and pulled a leaf off an overhanging branch. In a voice of careful nonchalance, she explained, "In matters of bargaining, believe in being reasonable, but my uncle would assuredly have tried to cheat you. He's perfectly dreadful about money."Ian nodded, remembering the fortune Julius Cameron had gouged out of him in order to sign the betrothal agreement."And so," she admitted, uneasily studying the azure-blue sky with feigned absorption, "I sent him a note after you left itemizing all the repairs that were needed at the house. I told him it was in poor condition and absolutely in need of complete redecoration.""And?""And I told him you would consider paying a fair price for the house, but not one shilling more, because it needed all that.""And?" Ian prodded."He has agreed to sell it for that figure."Ian's mirth exploded in shouts of laughter. Snatching her into his arms, he waited until he could finally catch his breath, then he tipped her face up to his. "Elizabeth," he said tenderly, "if you change your mind about marrying me, promise me you'll never represent the opposition at the bargaining table. I swear to God, I'd be lost." The temptation to kiss her was almost overwhelming, but the Townsende coach with its ducal crest was in the drive, and he had no idea where their chaperones might be. Elizabeth noticed the coach, too, and started toward the house."About the gowns," she said, stopping suddenly and looking up at him with an intensely earnest expression on her beautiful face. "I meant to thank you for your generosity as soon as you arrived, but I was so happy to-that is-" She realized she'd been about to blurt out that she was happy to see him, and she was so flustered by having admitted aloud what she hadn't admitted to herself that she completely lost her thought."Go on," Ian invited in a husky voice. "You were so happy to see me that you-""I forgot," she admitted lamely. book-quoteHis coach drew up before the Duke of Stanhope's town house, and Ian walked swiftly up the front steps, almost knocking poor Ormsley, who opened the door, off his feet in his haste to get to his grandfather upstairs. A few minutes later he strode back down and into the library, where he flung himself into a chair, his eyes riveted on the clock. Upstairs the household was in an uproar as the duke called for his valet, his butler, and his footmen. Unlike Ian, however, the duke was ecstatic. "Ormsley, Ian me!" the duke said happily, stripping off his jacket and pulling off his neckcloth. "He walked right in here and it."Ormsley beamed. "He did indeed, your grace.""I feel twenty years younger."Ormsley nodded. "This is a very great day.""What in hell is keeping Anderson? I need a shave. I want evening clothes-black, I think-a diamond stickpin and diamond studs. Stop thrusting that cane at me, man.""You shouldn't overly exert yourself, your grace.""Ormsley," said the duke as he walked over to an armoire and flung the doors open, "if you think I'm going to be leaning on that damned cane on the greatest night of my life, you're out of your mind. I'll walk in there beside my grandson unaided, thank you very much. Where the is book-quoteAnd the day we bargained about the betrothal, and you told me I had something you wanted very badly, what you wanted to do with me…was "
"Among other things," he agreed, tenderly brushing his knuckles over her flushed cheek.
"If I had known all this," she said with a rueful smile, "I'm certain I would have asked for additional concessions."
That startled him-the thought that she would have tried to drive a harder bargain if she'd realized exactly how much and what sort of power she really held. "What kind of additional concessions?" he asked, his face carefully expressionless.
She put her cheek against his shoulder, her arms curving around him. "A shorter betrothal," she whispered. "A shorter courtship, and a shorter ceremony."
A fresh surge of tenderness and profound pride swept through him at her sweetness and her candor, and he wrapped his arms tightly, protectively around her, smiling with joyous contentment. He had realized within minutes of meeting her that she was rare; he had known within hours that she was everything he wanted. Passionate and gentle, intelligent, sensitive, and witty. He loved all of her qualities, but he hadn't discovered the one he particularly admired until much later, and that was her courage. He was so proud of the courage that had enabled he to repeatedly confront adversity and adversaries-even when the adversary was him. book-quoteBut if you could just pay her some small attention-or better yet, escort her yourself-it would be ever so helpful, and I would be grateful forever.""Alex, if you were married to anyone but Jordan Townsende, I might consider asking you you'd be willing to express your gratitude. However, since I haven't any real wish to see my life brought to a premature end, I shall refrain from doing so and say instead that your smile is gratitude enough.""Don't joke, Roddy, I'm quite desperately in need of your help, and I would be eternally grateful for it.""You are making me quake with trepidation, my sweet. Whoever she is, she must be in a deal of trouble if you need me.""She's lovely and spirited, and you will admire her tremendously.""In that case, I shall deem it an embarrassing honor to lend my support to her. Who-" His gaze flicked to a sudden movement in the doorway and riveted there, his eternally bland expression giving way to reverent admiration. "My God," he whispered.Standing in the doorway like a vision from heaven was an unknown young woman clad in a shimmering silver-blue gown with a low, square neckline that offered a tantalizing view of smooth, voluptuous flesh, and a diagonally wrapped bodice that emphasized a tiny waist. Her glossy golden hair was swept back off her forehead and held in place with a sapphire clip, then left to fall artlessly about her shoulders and midway down her back, where it ended in luxurious waves and curls that gleamed brightly in the dancing candlelight. Beneath gracefully winged brows and long, curly lashes her glowing green eyes were neither jade nor emerald, but a startling color somewhere in between.In that moment of stunned silence Roddy observed her with the impartiality of a true connoisseur, looking for flaws that others would miss and finding only perfection in the delicately sculpted cheekbones, slender white throat, and soft mouth.The vision in the doorway moved imperceptibly. "Excuse me," she said to Alexandra with a melting smile, her voice like wind chimes, "I didn't realize you weren't alone."In a graceful swirl of silvery blue skirts she turned and vanished, and still Roddy stared at the empty doorway while Alexandra's hopes soared. Never had she seen Roddy display the slightest genuine fascination for a feminine face and figure. His words sent her spirits even higher: "My God," he said again in a reverent whisper. "Was she ""Very real," Alex eagerly assured him, "and very desperately in need of your help, though she mustn't know what I've asked of you. You will help, won't you?"Dragging his gaze from the doorway, he shook his head as if to clear it. "" he uttered dryly. "I'm tempted to offer her my very desirable hand in marriage! book-quoteLost in the stormy kiss, Elizabeth felt her legs gliding down his as he gently lowered her against him until her feet touched the floor. But when his fingers pulled at the ribbon that held her gown in place at her shoulder, she jerked free of his kiss, automatically clamping her hand over his. "What are you doing?" she asked in a quaking whisper. His fingers stilled, and Ian lifted his heavy-lidded gaze to hers.The question took him by surprise, but as he stared into her green eyes Ian saw her apprehension, and he had a good idea what was causing it. "What do you think I'm doing?" he countered cautiously.She hesitated, as if unwilling even to accuse him of such an unspeakable act, and then she admitted in a small, reluctant voice, "Disrobing me.""And that surprises you?""Surprises me? Of course it does. Why wouldn't it?" Elizabeth asked, more suspicious than ever of what Lucinda had told her.Quietly he said, "What exactly do you know about what takes place between a husband and wife in bed?""You-you mean 'as it pertains to the creation of children'?" she said, quoting his words to her the day she agreed to become betrothed to him.He smiled with tender amusement at her phrasing. "I suppose you can call it that-for now.""Only what Lucinda told me." He waited to hear an explanation, and Elizabeth reluctantly added, "She said a husband kisses his wife in bed and that it hurts the first time, and that is how it is done."Ian hesitated, angry with himself for not having followed his own instincts and questioned her further when she seemed fully informed and without maidenly qualms about lovemaking. As gently as he could, he said, "You're a very intelligent young woman, love, not an overly fastidious spinster like your former duenna. Now, do you honestly believe the rules of nature would be completely set aside for people? book-quoteIf she'd known what a good shot you are," he whispered past the unfamiliar tightness in his throat, "she'd never have dared." His hand lifted to her wet cheek, holding it pressed against his chest. "You could always call her out, you know." The spasmodic shaking in Elizabeth's slender shoulders began to subside, and Ian added with forced tightness, "Better yet, Robert should stand in for you. He's not as fine a shot as you are, but he's a hell of a lot …"
A teary giggle escaped the girl in his arms, and Ian continued, "On the other hand, if you're holding the pistol, you'll have some choices to make, and they're not easy…"
When he didn't say more, Elizabeth drew a shaky breath. "What choices?" she finally whispered against his chest after a moment.
"What to shoot, for one thing," he joked, stroking her back. "Robert was wearing Hessians, so I had a tassel for a target. I suppose, though, you could always shoot the bow off Valerie's gown."
Elizabeth's shoulders gave a lurch, and a choked laugh escaped her.
Overwhelmed with relief, Ian kept his left arm around her and gently took her chin between his forefinger and thumb, tipping her face up to his. Her magnificent eyes were still wet with tears, but a smile was trembling on her rosy lips. Teasingly, he continued, "A bow isn't much of a challenge for an expert marksman like you. I suppose you could insist that she hold up an earring between her fingers so you could shoot that instead."
The image was so absurd that Elizabeth chuckled.
Without being conscious of what he was doing, Ian moved his thumb from her chin to her lower lip, rubbing lightly against its inviting fullness. He finally realized what he was doing and stopped.
Elizabeth saw his jaw tighten. She drew a shuddering breath, sensing he'd been on the verge of kissing her, and had just decided not to do it. After the last shattering minutes, Elizabeth no longer knew who was friend or foe, she only knew she'd felt safe and secure in his arms, and at that moment his arms were already beginning to loosen, and his expression was turning aloof. Not certain what she was going to say or even what she wanted, she whispered a single, shaky word, filled with confusion and a plea for understanding, her green eyes searching his: "Please-"
Ian realized what she was asking for, but he responded with a questioning lift of his brows.
"I-" she began, uncomfortably aware of the knowing look in his eyes.
"Yes?" he prompted.
"I don't know-exactly," she admitted. All she knew for certain was that, for just a few minutes more, she would have liked to be in his arms.
"Elizabeth, if you want to be kissed, all you have to do is put your lips on mine."
"
"
"You heard me."
"Of all the arrogant-"
He shook his head in mild rebuke. "Spare me the maidenly protests. If you're suddenly as curious as I am to find out if it was as good between us as it now seems in retrospect, then say so." His own suggestion startled Ian, although having made it, he saw no great harm in exchanging a few kisses if that was what she wanted. book-quoteHis heart is weak, but his will is strong-more so now than ever," he continued, shrugging into the light cape Ormsley was putting over his shoulders."What do you mean, 'more now than ever'?"The physician smiled in surprise. "Why, I meant that your coming here has meant a great deal to him, my lord. It's had an amazing effect on him-well, not amazing, really. I should say a effect. Normally he rails at me when he's ill. Today he almost hugged me in his eagerness to tell me you were here, and why. Actually, I was ordered to "have a look at you," he continued in the confiding tone of an old family friend, "although I wasn't supposed to you I was doing so, of course." Grinning, he added, "He thinks you are a 'handsome devil.'"Ian refused to react to that admonishing information with any emotion whatsoever."Good day, my lord," the doctor said. Turning to the duke's sisters, who'd been hovering worriedly in the hall, he tipped his hat. "Ladies," he said, and he departed."I'll just go up and look in on him," Hortense announced. Turning to Charity, she said sternly, "Do not bore Ian with too much chatter," she admonished, already climbing the stairs. In an odd, dire voice, she added, "And do meddle."For the next hour Ian paced the floor, with Charity watching him with great interest. The one thing he did not have was time, and time was what he was losing. At this rate Elizabeth would be giving birth to her first child before he got back to London." book-quoteWhen Elizabeth finally descended the stairs on her way to the dining room she was two hours late. Deliberately.
"Good heavens, you're tardy, my dear!" Sir Francis said, shoving back his chair and rushing to the doorway where Elizabeth had been standing, trying to gather her courage to do what needed to be done. "Come and meet my guests," he said, drawing her forward after a swift, disappointed look at her drab attire and severe coiffure. "We did as you suggested in your note and went ahead with supper. What kept you abovestairs so long?"
"I was at prayer," Elizabeth said, managing to look him straight in the eye.
Sir Francis recovered from his surprise in time to introduce her to the three other people at the table-two men who resembled him in age and features and two women of perhaps five and thirty who were both attired in the most shockingly revealing gowns Elizabeth had ever seen. Elizabeth accepted a helping of cold meat to silence her protesting stomach while both women studied her with unhidden scorn. "That is a most unusual ensemble you're wearing, I must say," remarked the woman named Eloise. "Is it the custom where you come from to dress so…simply?"
Elizabeth took a dainty bite of meat. "Not really. I disapprove of too much personal adornment." She turned to Sir Francis with an innocent stare. "Gowns are expensive. I consider them a great waste of money."
Sir Francis was suddenly inclined to agree, particularly since he intended to keep her naked as much as possible. "Quite right!" he beamed, eyeing the other ladies with pointed disapproval. "No sense in spending all that money on gowns. No point in spending money at all."
"My sentiments exactly," Elizabeth said, nodding. "I prefer to give every shilling I can find to charity instead."
" it away?" he said in a muted roar, half rising out of his chair. Then he forced himself to sit back down and reconsider the wisdom of wedding her. She was lovely-her face more mature then he remembered it, but not even the black veil and scraped-back hair could detract from the beauty of her emerald-green eyes with their long, sooty lashes. Her eyes had dark circles beneath them-shadows he didn't recall seeing there earlier in the day. He put the shadows down to her far-too-serious nature. Her dowry was creditable, and her body beneath that shapeless black gown…he wished he could see her shape. Perhaps it, too, had changed, and not for the better, in the past few years.
"I had hoped, my dear," Sir Francis said, covering her hand with his and squeezing it affectionately, "that you might wear something else down to supper, as I suggested you should."
Elizabeth gave him an innocent stare. "This is all I brought."
"All you brought?" he uttered. "B-But I definitely saw my footmen carrying several trunks upstairs."
"They belong to my aunt-only one of them is mine," she fabricated hastily, already anticipating his next question and thinking madly for some satisfactory answer.
"Really?" He continued to eye her gown with great dissatisfaction, and then he asked exactly the question she'd expected: "What, may I ask, does your one truck contain if not gowns?"
Inspiration struck, and Elizabeth smiled radiantly. "Something of great value. Priceless value," she confided.
All faces at the table watched her with alert fascination-particularly the greedy Sir Francis. "Well, don't keep us in suspense, love. What's in it?"
"The mortal remains of Saint Jacob. book-quote
