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Grammar Snobs Are Great Big Meanies: A Guide to Language for Fun and Spite
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Grammar Snobs Are Great Big Meanies: A Guide to Language for Fun and Spite
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June Casagrande
_
Grammar Snobs Are Great Big
Amateur grammar snobs are a lot like amateur gynecologists-they're everywhere, they're all too eager to offer their services, and they're anything but gentle.
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June Casagrande
_
Grammar Snobs Are Great Big
Feel free to use the following mnemonic device to help you remember: "To lay is to get laid and laid." {This is meant in the stuffiest grammatical sense and in no way implies the kind of smut a Santa Monica police officer might read into it.} "To lie," then, works as follows. "Today I lie on the beach." "Yesterday I lay on the beach." "At times, I have lain on the beach." None of those acts puts me in any danger of being arrested for lewd and lascivious behavior. But that's only because I conjugated the verb correctly. I
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June Casagrande
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Grammar Snobs Are Great Big
Rumor had it that Professor Jerkwad had a history of holding classes in bars and using the school's senior class as harvesting grounds for a long string of wives who never seemed to stay married to him past age twenty-eight. Rumor also had it that a few years later he was canned from his job mid some rather unpleasant allegations, but we journalists can't succumb to rumor and conjecture when nonspecific innuendo is so much more titillating.
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June Casagrande
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Grammar Snobs Are Great Big
I hope that, by this point, you're feeling a little less intimidated by the meanies, because I've got some bad news: Meanies come in many forms, not just human. They can be not only animal, but also mineral. In rare cases, they can even be vegetable, but we can talk about William F. Buckley some other time.
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June Casagrande
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Grammar Snobs Are Great Big
For Whom the Snob Trolls
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June Casagrande
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Grammar Snobs Are Great Big
You must now--before God, Jon Stewart, and whoever's sleeping next to you {even if these entities are one and the same}--make a solemn oath.
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June Casagrande
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Grammar Snobs Are Great Big
This chapter is dedicated to those other delights of punctuation--exquisite little squiggles, those most delightful dots and dashes, and other tragically under-appreciated tiny tidbits!Nah. I'm just yankin' your chain.
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June Casagrande
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Grammar Snobs Are Great Big
Is that a dangler in your memo or are you just glad to see me?
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June Casagrande
_
Grammar Snobs Are Great Big
Amateur grammar snobs are a lot like amateur gynecologists--they're everywhere, they're all to eager to offer their services, and they're anything but gentle.
book-quote
June Casagrande
_
Grammar Snobs Are Great Big
Grammar snobs are a distinct breed from their gentle cousins: word nerds and grammar geeks. The difference is bloodlust.
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June Casagrande
_
Grammar Snobs Are Great Big
As you can see, the hyphen is a nasty, tricky, evil little mark that gets its kicks igniting arguments in newsrooms and trying to make everyone in the English-speaking world look like an idiot - it's the Bill Maher of punctuation."
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