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Book: Life, the Universe and Everything
Quotes of Book: Life, the Universe and
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  1. Douglas Adams _ Life, the Universe and

    We already have the Wooden Pillar, the Steel Pillar and the Plastic Pillar. In a moment we will have the Golden Bail....'No, you won't.'We will,' stated the robot simply.No, you won't. It makes my ship work.'In a moment,' repeated the robot patiently, 'we will have the Golden Bail....'You will not,' said Zaphod.And then we must go,' said the robot, in all seriousness, 'to a party.'Oh,' said Zaphod, startled, 'can I come?'No,' said the robot, 'we are going to shoot you.'Oh, yeah?' said Zaphod, waggling his gun.Yes,' said the robot, and they shot him.Zaphod was so surprised that they had to shoot him again before he fell down. {85-86}
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  2. Douglas Adams _ Life, the Universe and

    What a wonderfully exciting cough,' said the little man, quite startled by it, 'do you mind if I join you?' And with that he launched into the most extraordinary and spectacular fit of coughing which caught Arthur so much by surprise that he started to choke violently, discovered he was already doing it and got thoroughly confused.
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  3. Douglas Adams _ Life, the Universe and

    Rule Six: The winning team shall be the first team that wins.
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  4. Douglas Adams _ Life, the Universe and

    Several billion trillion tons of superhot exploding hydrogen nuclei rose slowly above the horizon and managed to look small, cold and slightly damp.
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  5. Douglas Adams _ Life, the Universe and

    My doctor says that I have a malformed public duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fiber
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  6. Douglas Adams _ Life, the Universe and

    The party and the Krikkit warship looked, in their writhings, a little like two ducks, one of which is trying to make a third duck inside the second duck, whilst the second duck is trying very hard to explain that it doesn't feel ready for a third duck right now, is uncertain that it would want any putative third duck anyway, and certainly not whilst it, the second duck, was busy flying.
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  7. Douglas Adams _ Life, the Universe and

    There is an art, it says, or rather, a knack to flying. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss. … Clearly, it is this second part, the missing, which presents the difficulties.
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  8. Douglas Adams _ Life, the Universe and

    I have detected," he said, "disturbances in the wash."...Arthur asked him to repeat what he had just said because he hadn't quite understood his meaning. Ford repeated it."The wash?" said Arthur."The space time wash," said Ford.Arthur nodded, and then cleared his throat."Are we talking about," he asked cautiously, "some sort of Vogon laundromat, or what are we talking about?""Eddies," said Ford, "in the space-time continuum.""Ah," nodded Arthur, "is he. Is he."..."What?" said Ford."Er, who," said Arthur, "is Eddy, then, exactly, then?"Ford looked angrily at him."Will you listen?" he snapped."I have been listening," said Arthur, "but I'm not sure it's helped."Ford grasped him by the lapels of his dressing gown and spoke to him as slowly and distinctly and patiently as if he were somebody from the telephone company accounts department."There seems..." he said, "to be some pools..." he said, "of instability," he said, "in the fabric..." he said.Arthur looked foolishly at the cloth of his dressing gown where Ford was holding it. Ford swept on before Arthur could turn the foolish look into a foolish remark."...in the fabric of space-time," he said."Ah, that," said Arthur."Yes, that," confirmed Ford.They stood there alone on a hill on prehistoric Earth and stared each other resolutely in the face."And it's done what?" said Arthur."It," said Ford, "has developed pools of instability.""Has it," said Arthur, his eyes not wavering for a moment"It has," said Ford, with the similar degree of ocular immobility."Good," said Arthur."See?" said Ford."No," said Arthur.There was a quiet pause...."Arthur," said Ford."Hello? Yes?" said Arthur."Just believe everything I tell you, and it will all be very, very simple.""Ah, well, I'm not sure I believe that."They sat down and composed their thoughts.Ford got out his Sub-Etha Sens-O-Matic. It was making vague humming noises and a tiny light on it was flickering faintly."Flat battery?" said Arthur."No," said Ford, "there is a moving disturbance in the fabric of space-time, an eddy, a pool of instability, and it's somewhere in our vicinity."..."There!" said Ford, shooting out his arm; "there, behind that sofa!"Arthur looked. Much to his surprise, there was a velvet paisley-covered Chesterfield sofa in the field in front of them. He boggled intelligently at it. Shrewd questions sprang into his mind."Why," he said, "is there a sofa in that field?""I told you!" shouted Ford, leaping to his feet. "Eddies in the space-time continuum!""And this is his sofa, is it?"... 12 chapters pass ..."All will become clear," said Slartibartfast."When?""In a minute. Listen. The time streams are now very polluted. There's a lot of muck floating about in them, flotsam and jetsam, and more and more of it is now being regurgitated into the physical world. Eddies in the space-time continuum, you see.""So I hear," said Arthur.
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  9. Douglas Adams _ Life, the Universe and

    In fact, Lig never formally resigned his editorship-he merely left his office late one morning, and has never returned since. Though well over a century has now passed, many members of the Guide staff still retain the romantic notion that he has simply popped out for a sandwich and will yet return to put in a solid afternoon's work. Strictly speaking, all editors since Lig Lury Jr., have therefore been designated acting editors, and Lig's desk is still preserved the way he left it, with the addition of a small sign that says LIG LURY, JR., EDITOR, MISSING, PRESUMED FED.
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  10. Douglas Adams _ Life, the Universe and

    He inched his way up the corridor as if he would rather be yarding his way down it, which was true.
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  11. Douglas Adams _ Life, the Universe and

    I don't believe it. Prove it to me and I still won't believe it.
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  12. Douglas Adams _ Life, the Universe and

    The technology involved in making anything invisible is so infinitely complex that nine hundred and ninety-nine billion, nine hundred and ninety-nine million, nine hundred and ninety-nine thousand, nine hundred and ninety-nine times out of a trillion it is much simpler and more effective just to take the thing away and do without it.
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