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Book: The Four Tendencies: The Indispensable Personality Profiles That Reveal How to Make Your Life Better
Quotes of Book: The Four Tendencies: The
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  1. Gretchen Rubin _ The Four Tendencies: The

    In fact, the Upholder commitment to meeting expectations can sometimes make Upholders seem…cold. There's a relentless quality to Upholders. They're going to do what must be done even, sometimes, if that means inconveniencing other people or being out of step.
    book-quote

  2. Gretchen Rubin _ The Four Tendencies: The

    I pegged her as a highly considerate UPHOLDER/Obliger. She's able to meet inner expectations without outer accountability, but only when outer expectations don't interfere.
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  3. Gretchen Rubin _ The Four Tendencies: The

    She eagerly meets society's rules and laws until they conflict with her own inner sense of justice-at which point she rejects them.
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  4. Gretchen Rubin _ The Four Tendencies: The

    Almost always, if I make a commitment, I can stick to it, even without outside help.
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  5. Gretchen Rubin _ The Four Tendencies: The

    as always, Upholders must make sure to articulate their inner expectations.
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  6. Gretchen Rubin _ The Four Tendencies: The

    Upholders-tipped-to-Obligers have a commitment to both inner and outer expectations, for them, the pull of outer expectations is very hard to ignore; UPHOLDER/Obligers must be sure to articulate inner expectations and to create boundaries to protect inner expectations from outer interference.
    book-quote

  7. Gretchen Rubin _ The Four Tendencies: The

    UPHOLDER/Obligers must be sure to articulate inner expectations and to create boundaries to protect inner expectations from outer interference."
    book-quote

  8. Gretchen Rubin _ The Four Tendencies: The

    In a nutshell, Rebels respond best to a sequence of information, consequences, and choice. We must give Rebels the information they need to make an informed decision; alert them to the consequences of actions they might take; then allow them to choose-
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  9. Gretchen Rubin _ The Four Tendencies: The

    But it doesn't matter what we think a person {or ourselves} "should be able to" do-what matters is only what works for each individual. To help people change their habits or behavior, we should help get them what they need to succeed, whether that's more clarity, more information, more outer accountability, or more choices.
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  10. Gretchen Rubin _ The Four Tendencies: The

    When Obligers have the external accountability they need to meet their inner expectations, they don't experience any sense of limitation or self-frustration-and of course many environments, such as the workplace, tend to supply lots of accountability. When what others expect from Obligers is what they expect from themselves, they have the life they want.
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  11. Gretchen Rubin _ The Four Tendencies: The

    when dealing with a child who refuses to meet an expectation, it's important to try to understand the reason for that child's behavior. While a Rebel child might think, "You can't make me," a Questioner child may be waiting to hear a convincing argument about why meeting an expectation is worthwhile."
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  12. Gretchen Rubin _ The Four Tendencies: The

    Information, consequences, choice. Without lectures or micro-management or rescue.
    book-quote
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