Book: The Golden Notebook
Quotes of Book: The Golden Notebook
Maryrose smiled good-humouredly, and remained in the circle of his arm, but as if she detached herself from him and every other man. Very many as it were professionally pretty girls have this gift of allowing themselves to be touched, kissed, held, as if this were a fee they have to pay to Providence for being born beautiful. There is a tolerant smile which goes with a submission to the hands of men, like a yawn or a patient sigh. But there was more to it, in Maryrose's case. "Maryrose," said Ted, bluffly, looking down at the gleaming little head at rest on his shoulder, "why don't you love any of us, why don't you let any of us love you?" Maryrose merely smiled, and even in this broken light, branch-and-leaf-stippled, her brown eyes showed enormous and shone softly. "Maryrose has a broken heart," observed Willi above my head. "Broken hearts belong to old-fashioned novels," said Paul. "They don't go with the time we live in." "On the contrary," said Ted. "There are more broken hearts than there have ever been, just because of the times we live in. In fact I'm sure any heart we are ever likely to meet is so cracked and jarred and split it's just a mass of scar tissue." Maryrose smiled up at Ted, shyly, but gratefully, and said seriously: "Yes, of course that's true. book-quoteAs time went on, he began to use mechanical means. {I look at the word mechanical - a man wouldn't use it.} Paul began to rely on manipulating her externally, on giving Ella clitoral orgasms. Very exciting. Yet there was always a part of her that resented it. Because she felt that the fact he wanted to, was an expression of his instinctive desire not to commit himself to her. She felt that without knowing it or being conscious of it {though perhaps he was conscious of it} he was afraid of the emotion. A vaginal orgasm is emotion and nothing else, felt as emotion and expressed in sensations that are indistinguishable from emotion. The vaginal orgasm is a dissolving in a vague, dark generalized sensation like being swirled in a warm whirlpool. There are several different sorts of clitoral orgasms, and they are more powerful {that is a male word} than the vaginal orgasm. There can be a thousand thrills, sensations, etc., but there is only one real female orgasm and that is when a man, from the whole of his need and desire takes a woman and wants all her response. Everything else is a substitute and a fake, and the most inexperienced woman feels this instinctively. book-quote
