The first time I see him is during lunch. As I'm waiting in the cafeteria food line, Alex is two people in front of me. This girl, Nola Linn, is in between us. And she's not moving down the line fast enough.
Alex's jeans are faded and torn at the knee. His hair is falling into his eyes and I'm itching to push it back. If Nola wouldn't be so wishy-washy about her choice of fruit…
Alex caught me checking him out. I quickly focus my attention on the soup of the day. Minestrone.
"Want a cup or bowl, hon?" Mary, the lunch lady, asks me.
"Bowl," I say, pretending to be totally interested in the way she ladles the soup into the bowl.
After she hands it to me, I hurry past Nola and stand by the cashier. Right behind Alex.
As if he knows I'm stalking him, he turns around. His eyes pierce mine and for a moment I feel as if the rest of the world is closed out and it's just the two of us. The urge to jump into his arms and feel the warmth of them surrounding me is so powerful, I wonder if it's medically possible to be addicted to another human being.
I clear my throat. "Your turn," I say, motioning to the cashier.
He moves forward with his tray, a slice of pizza on it. "I'll pay for hers, too," he says, pointing at me.
The cashier waves her finger at me, "What'd you get? Bowl of minestrone?"
"Yeah, but…Alex, don't pay for me."
"Don't worry. I can afford a bowl of soup," he says defensively, handing over three dollars.
Colin barges into the line and stands next to me. "Move along. Get your own girlfriend to stare at," he snaps at Alex, then shoos him off.
I pray Alex doesn't retaliate by telling Colin we kissed. Everyone in line is watching us. I can feel their stares on the back of my neck. Alex takes his change from the cashier and without a backward glance heads for the outside courtyard off the cafeteria where he usually sits.
I feel so selfish, because I want the best of both worlds. I want to keep the image I've worked so hard to create. That image includes Colin. I also want Alex. I can't stop thinking about having him hold me again and kiss me until I'm breathless.
Colin says to the cashier, "I'll pay for hers and mine."
The cashier looks at me in confusion. "Didn't that other boy pay for you already?"
Colin waits for me to correct her. When I don't, he gives me a disgusted look and stomps out of the cafeteria."
Alex's jeans are faded and torn at the knee. His hair is falling into his eyes and I'm itching to push it back. If Nola wouldn't be so wishy-washy about her choice of fruit…
Alex caught me checking him out. I quickly focus my attention on the soup of the day. Minestrone.
"Want a cup or bowl, hon?" Mary, the lunch lady, asks me.
"Bowl," I say, pretending to be totally interested in the way she ladles the soup into the bowl.
After she hands it to me, I hurry past Nola and stand by the cashier. Right behind Alex.
As if he knows I'm stalking him, he turns around. His eyes pierce mine and for a moment I feel as if the rest of the world is closed out and it's just the two of us. The urge to jump into his arms and feel the warmth of them surrounding me is so powerful, I wonder if it's medically possible to be addicted to another human being.
I clear my throat. "Your turn," I say, motioning to the cashier.
He moves forward with his tray, a slice of pizza on it. "I'll pay for hers, too," he says, pointing at me.
The cashier waves her finger at me, "What'd you get? Bowl of minestrone?"
"Yeah, but…Alex, don't pay for me."
"Don't worry. I can afford a bowl of soup," he says defensively, handing over three dollars.
Colin barges into the line and stands next to me. "Move along. Get your own girlfriend to stare at," he snaps at Alex, then shoos him off.
I pray Alex doesn't retaliate by telling Colin we kissed. Everyone in line is watching us. I can feel their stares on the back of my neck. Alex takes his change from the cashier and without a backward glance heads for the outside courtyard off the cafeteria where he usually sits.
I feel so selfish, because I want the best of both worlds. I want to keep the image I've worked so hard to create. That image includes Colin. I also want Alex. I can't stop thinking about having him hold me again and kiss me until I'm breathless.
Colin says to the cashier, "I'll pay for hers and mine."
The cashier looks at me in confusion. "Didn't that other boy pay for you already?"
Colin waits for me to correct her. When I don't, he gives me a disgusted look and stomps out of the cafeteria."
( Simone Elkeles )
[ Perfect Chemistry ]
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