It was as if I had trembled for a lifetime, due to a chronic underground current of fear. Tremare, run away, finish in trouble, lose the people I loved. As a cartoon character instead of a person, I realized. A cartoon of the thirties, moldy. Behind everything I had done there had always been the fear of pushing me.
The passage reflects a profound sense of anxiety and fear that has permeated the narrator's life, likening his experiences to a persistent underground current. This fear manifests as a fear of failure and loss, leading him to feel more like a character in a vintage cartoon than a real person, indicating a struggle with identity and authenticity.
This metaphor emphasizes the paralyzing nature of his fears, suggesting that his actions have often been driven by the desire to avoid trouble and preserve his relationships. Ultimately, it highlights the impact of fear on personal growth and genuine self-expression, a recurring theme in Philip K. Dick's work.
