I don't want to do anything. I don't wish to go anywhere. Most of the time I don't want to even be here, but you're not supposed to say that, are you? You're just supposed to say insightful meaningful things that surprise people so that they can tell other people how brave you are. Brave, but I was never the brave one. Why it should fall upon me to become that now is beyond me.
The quote reflects a deep sense of apathy and resignation. The speaker expresses an overwhelming desire to disengage from life, indicating that they often feel out of place and reluctant to participate in societal expectations. It contrasts the pressure to appear insightful and courageous in a world that values superficial bravery over genuine feelings.
Moreover, the speaker grapples with the notion that they are expected to be brave and inspirational despite their own struggles. This struggle highlights a sense of isolation, as they feel burdened by the need to meet others’ expectations instead of expressing their true feelings of disconnection and exhaustion. The desire for authenticity in a world filled with pretenses comes through powerfully in this introspection.