I laugh and it's the same bitter laugh I remember him giving when we met so many weeks ago. Isaiah says it so simply that my heart soars and sinks at the same time. I whisper. Isaiah shakes his head and stares out the window. I ask. Because I don't know how the two of us can continue forward. Isaiah refuses to let me in. It's sort of cruel. He's brought me close with his stories of his childhood and with his words of love, but he can't relinquish control. I refuse to be with someone who won't treat me as an equal.

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The narrator recalls a moment with Isaiah, feeling a mixture of joy and sorrow at his words. Despite their growing emotional connection through shared stories and expressions of love, there is an underlying tension as Isaiah seems to hold back his true feelings. This push-and-pull creates confusion about the future of their relationship.

The narrator grapples with the unfairness of their situation, recognizing that Isaiah's reluctance to open up is a barrier. They crave an equal partnership, but Isaiah's control over his emotions feels cruel. This conflict highlights the challenges they face in navigating their bond, as the narrator demands mutual respect and vulnerability.

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February 16, 2025

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