The quote reflects the inner thoughts of a character who grapples with feelings of self-doubt and the pressure of social acceptance. The character wonders why she believed that her presence was only welcome if others were exceedingly enthusiastic about it. This belief led her to shy away from various social opportunities, fearing that she might be seen as an unwelcome presence rather than someone who could contribute positively to the gathering.
This introspection highlights how such misconceptions can inhibit one's ability to engage with others and enjoy life. The character realizes that her habit of refusal stemmed from an unfounded fear of being a nuisance, which ultimately prevented her from experiencing joy and connection with peers, reinforcing the idea that self-imposed barriers can hinder personal growth and social interaction.