She told me that the brain is built to forget things as we continue to live, that memories are meant to fade and disintegrate, that skin, so protective in the beginning because it has to be to protect our organs, sags eventually - because the organs aren't so hot anymore either - and sharp edges become blunt, that the pain of letting go of grief is just as painful or even more painful then the grief itself. It means goodbye, it means going to Rotterdam when you weren't expecting to and having no way of telling anyone you won't be back for a while.
by Miriam Toews
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She explained that the brain is inherently designed to forget, allowing memories to fade over time. This natural process of forgetting is part of how life moves forward, with memories disintegrating as they become less relevant or vivid. Similarly, she described how the skin, initially protective, eventually sags because the organs inside also lose their resilience, and even sharp edges dull with age.

"The pain of letting go of grief is just as painful or even more painful than the grief itself," she said. This quote highlights the difficult process of saying goodbye, which often involves unexpected changes like going to Rotterdam without notice, and the inability to inform others since the moment is so sudden and emotionally intense.

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