I wanted your experience of Court to be as easy as possible. Your brother just shrugged off the initial barbs and affronts, but I knew they'd slay you. We did our best to protect you from them, though your handling of the situation with Tamara showed us that you were very capable of directing your own affairs."
"What about Elenet?" I asked, and winced, hating to sound like the kind of jealous person I admired least. But the image of that goldenwood throne had entered my mind and would not be banished. He looked slightly surprised. "What about her?"
"People--some people--put your names together. And," I added firmly, "she'd make a good queen. Better than I."
He lifted his cup, and I saw my ring gleaming on his finger. He'd worn that since he left Bran and Nee's ball. He'd been wearing it, I thought, when we sat in this very inn and he went through that terrible inner debate on whether or not I was a traitor.
I dropped my head and stared into my cup.
"Elenet," he said, "is an old friend. We grew up together and regard one another as brother and sister, a comfortable arrangement since neither of us had siblings."
I thought of that glance she'd given him when I spied on them in the Royal Wing courtyard. She had betrayed feelings that were not sisterly. But he hadn't seen that look because his heart lay otherwhere.
I pressed my lips together. She was worthy, but her love was not returned. Suddenly I understood why she had been so guarded around me. The honorable course for me would be to keep to myself what I had seen.
Shevraeth continued, "She spent her time with me as a mute warning to the Merindars, who had to know that she came to report on Grumareth's activities, and I didn't want them trying any kind of retaliation. She realized that our social proximity would cause gossip. That was inevitable. But she heeded it not; she just wants to return to Grumareth and resume guiding her lands to prosperity again." He paused, then said, "As for her quality, it is undeniable. But I think the time has come for a different perspective, one that is innate in you. It is a problem, I have come to realize, with our Court upbringing. No one, including Elenet, has the gift you have of looking every person you encounter in the face and accepting the person behind the status. We all were raised to see servants and merchants as faceless as we pursued the high strategy. I'm half convinced this is part of the reason why the kingdom ended up in the grip of the likes of the Merindars."
I nodded, and for the first time comprehended what a relationship with him really meant for the rest of my life. "The goldenwood throne," I said. "In the letter. I thought you had it ordered for, well, someone else."
His smile was gone. "It doesn't yet exist. How could it? Though I intend for there to be one, for the duties of ruling have to begin as a partnership. Until the other night, I had no idea if I would win you or not."
"Win me," I repeated. "What a contest!
"What about Elenet?" I asked, and winced, hating to sound like the kind of jealous person I admired least. But the image of that goldenwood throne had entered my mind and would not be banished. He looked slightly surprised. "What about her?"
"People--some people--put your names together. And," I added firmly, "she'd make a good queen. Better than I."
He lifted his cup, and I saw my ring gleaming on his finger. He'd worn that since he left Bran and Nee's ball. He'd been wearing it, I thought, when we sat in this very inn and he went through that terrible inner debate on whether or not I was a traitor.
I dropped my head and stared into my cup.
"Elenet," he said, "is an old friend. We grew up together and regard one another as brother and sister, a comfortable arrangement since neither of us had siblings."
I thought of that glance she'd given him when I spied on them in the Royal Wing courtyard. She had betrayed feelings that were not sisterly. But he hadn't seen that look because his heart lay otherwhere.
I pressed my lips together. She was worthy, but her love was not returned. Suddenly I understood why she had been so guarded around me. The honorable course for me would be to keep to myself what I had seen.
Shevraeth continued, "She spent her time with me as a mute warning to the Merindars, who had to know that she came to report on Grumareth's activities, and I didn't want them trying any kind of retaliation. She realized that our social proximity would cause gossip. That was inevitable. But she heeded it not; she just wants to return to Grumareth and resume guiding her lands to prosperity again." He paused, then said, "As for her quality, it is undeniable. But I think the time has come for a different perspective, one that is innate in you. It is a problem, I have come to realize, with our Court upbringing. No one, including Elenet, has the gift you have of looking every person you encounter in the face and accepting the person behind the status. We all were raised to see servants and merchants as faceless as we pursued the high strategy. I'm half convinced this is part of the reason why the kingdom ended up in the grip of the likes of the Merindars."
I nodded, and for the first time comprehended what a relationship with him really meant for the rest of my life. "The goldenwood throne," I said. "In the letter. I thought you had it ordered for, well, someone else."
His smile was gone. "It doesn't yet exist. How could it? Though I intend for there to be one, for the duties of ruling have to begin as a partnership. Until the other night, I had no idea if I would win you or not."
"Win me," I repeated. "What a contest!
( Sherwood Smith )
[ Court Duel ]
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