So are you bailing? Is that what this is?" he muttered, staring angrily at me. "I have your number. If I wanted to bail, I would have called and told you to fuck off." Cooper exhaled hard then looked around the courtyard. Returning his gaze to me, he shook his head. "Why is everything so difficult with you?" "Because you're an asshole who makes me feel bad," I said then added, "On purpose." "You wanted me to kiss you. We had a nice dinner and you wanted to be close. I tried to be close and you punished me for it." "Fuck you," I whispered, stepping back against the door. "You knew what you were doing. You figured I liked you more than you liked me, so you could do whatever you wanted. I'm just trash." "Fuck you back," he growled. "There is no way in hell you like me more than I like you. If you did, you wouldn't keep saying no." "So fine, let's just fuck today and get it over with. That way, you can get on with your life." "Shit!" he yelled, walking halfway down the path before turning around and hurrying back. When he reached me, I flinched at the ferocity of his movements. "I want you so bad, but it's not just sex. If it was, I'd fuck someone else and pretend she was you then flip you off and move on with my life. I tease you, but it's not about sex. You fucking know that too." "I don't know anything," I said, nervous now because I wondered if he might hurt me. Looking like he was ready to hit something, his hands flexed in and out of fists. "I was really happy after dinner. I wanted to bring you here and make out, but then you scared me. You did that on purpose to make me feel weak. Fine, I feel weak and I'm afraid of you." Cooper glanced to his right at the sound of people talking. Looking back at me, he lost much of his irritation. "It's hard being patient, okay?" he said in a needy voice. "Then, we'll get it over with today and you won't have to be patient anymore." Cooper's expression softened into a panicked, almost pained look. "I want all of you. Not just sex. I want you to take down all of your walls for me. It felt so fucking beautiful to see you a little better after you told me about Mrs. Prescott. I felt relieved, but also desperate. I want you to look at me like you did after you told me that story, but I have to wait. I get that." "Sex will be another wall." "We're not having sex today," he said, sighing. "You're looking at me like I'm a piece of shit that'll hit you. You actually look afraid of me. No way do you want to have sex and I'm not doing it unless you're really giving yourself to me. No fake Farah shit. No walled up crap. I want the real you and the real you doesn't want to have sex with me," he muttered then added, "Today." "Had to put in the disclaimer, huh?" I said, grinning slightly. "It was too painful not to put it in." "I do want to go swimming." "And spend time with me?" he asked, nudging me with his knee. "Throw me a bone here.
( Bijou Hunter )
[ Damaged and the Beast ]
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