C.S. Lewis highlights the differing perceptions of unselfishness between men and women. For women, unselfishness often manifests as taking on the burdens of others, such as offering help and support. Men, on the other hand, tend to view it as a matter of refraining from causing inconvenience or trouble to others. This fundamental difference leads to misunderstandings, as each gender may see the other's behavior as self-centered.

This disparity in understanding can result in mutual accusations of selfishness. Women may see men as indifferent or neglectful because they prioritize rights and boundaries over emotional support. Conversely, men might perceive women’s focus on helping as meddlesome or overbearing. Thus, both are trapped in a cycle of misinterpretation, demonstrating how their distinct views on unselfishness can create conflict in their interactions.