An old rusty beer can lay in her path; she kicked it viciously. What is it, she thought, is this the way Nueva York is set up, then, freeloaders and victims? Schoenmaker freeloads off my roommate, she freeloads of me. Is there this long daisy chain of victimisers and victims, screwers and screwees? And if so, who is it I am screwing.

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In the narrative, the protagonist encounters an old, rusty beer can, which serves as a catalyst for her frustration, prompting her to kick it angrily. This action symbolizes her feelings of resentment towards her surroundings and the dynamics of her life in New York City. She reflects on the relationships around her, questioning the nature of her interactions with people like Schoenmaker and her roommate.

This contemplation leads her to analyze a disturbing pattern of dependency and exploitation in her social circle, pondering whether she is part of a cycle of people who take advantage of one another. She is caught in a web of “freeloaders and victims,” and grapples with the implications of her role in this complex system. The introspective questioning reveals her concern about the morality of her actions and the relationships she navigates.

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February 20, 2025

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