In Anne Lamott's "Operating Instructions: A Journal of My Son's First Year," she expresses a deep sense of despair, feeling that her heart has been irreparably broken. The weight of her grief makes it seem impossible to find joy again; she believes that contentment might only be a distant possibility. Despite her friends and family urging her to seek help and move forward, Lamott finds solace in allowing herself to grieve fully, lying in the mud of her emotions until she's ready to rise again.

The quote reflects a profound struggle with loss and the expectation to quickly recover. Lamott's experience resonates with anyone who has faced deep sorrow, as it underscores the importance of acknowledging pain rather than rushing through it. Her candid admission of needing to embrace her grief before seeking recovery highlights a universal truth about healing: that sometimes, we must sit in our sadness to eventually find our way back to the light.