In this reflection, the author grapples with the complex nature of attraction and love. She expresses a concern that once someone begins to reciprocate her feelings, they may lose their allure and become ordinary in her eyes. This suggests a fear of losing the idealized image she has of them, as the magic of attraction often fades upon further acquaintance.
Additionally, the author acknowledges a pattern in her past relationships, where initial admiration quickly turns to disappointment as she discovers flaws in those she once idolized. This cycle highlights a struggle between the longing for connection and the reality of human imperfections, indicating a deeper exploration of her own expectations in love and relationships.