As it did go. They never talked about the sex, let it happen, at first only in the tent at night, then in the full daylight with the hot sun striking down, and at evening in the fire glow, quick, rough, laughing and snorting, no lack of noises, but saying not a goddamn word except once Ennis said, I'm not no queer, and Jack jumped in with Me neither. A one-shot thing. Nobody's business but ours.

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The passage reflects the complex relationship between two men, Ennis and Jack, who engage in an intimate relationship without openly discussing it. Initially, their encounters are confined to the privacy of a tent, but as their bond deepens, they find themselves expressing their feelings in the open, under the sun and by the fire. Their physical interaction is characterized by laughter and spontaneity, yet they maintain an unspoken agreement to keep their emotions and identities hidden.

Their brief acknowledgment of their identities reveals their struggle with societal norms, as Ennis asserts he's "not no queer" and Jack echoes the sentiment, emphasizing that it's a one-time affair meant to be kept private. This illustrates the tension between their desires and the reality of their circumstances, where love and attraction are intertwined with confusion and secrecy. It speaks to the broader themes of alienation and the search for acceptance in a world that may not understand or tolerate their bond.

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January 25, 2025

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