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Back in the autumn I had awakened to a growing darkness and cacophony, as if something in the depths were crying out. A whole chorus of voices. Orphaned voices. They seemed to speak for all the unlived parts of me, and they came with a force and dazzle that I couldn't contain. They seemed to explode the boundaries of my existence. I know now that they were the clamor of a new self struggling to be born.
by Sue Monk Kidd
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In the autumn, the author experiences a profound awakening marked by an unsettling darkness and overwhelming noise. This cacophony appears to represent the myriad of orphaned voices within, each echoing the unlived aspects of her life. The intensity of these feelings is so powerful that they seem to challenge the very limits of her existence, signaling that a transformative change is imminent.

These voices reflect a vital struggle of a new...

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When the Heart Waits: Spiritual Direction for Life's Sacred Questions
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      34
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      35
      platform
      36
      ttt
      37
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      38
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      39
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      40
      i
      41
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      42
      rating
      43
      bar_length
    • frontend::inc.item (resources/views/vendor/frontend/inc/item.blade.php)44blade
      Params
      0
      __env
      1
      app
      2
      ad
      3
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      4
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      5
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      6
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      7
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      10
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      11
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      13
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      14
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      15
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      16
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      19
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      20
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      22
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      23
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      24
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      25
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      26
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      28
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      29
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      30
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      31
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      33
      category
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      40
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      41
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      42
      rating
      43
      bar_length
    • frontend::inc.item (resources/views/vendor/frontend/inc/item.blade.php)44blade
      Params
      0
      __env
      1
      app
      2
      ad
      3
      settings
      4
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      5
      platforms
      6
      footer_pages
      7
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      8
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      9
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      10
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      11
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      12
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      13
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      14
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      15
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      16
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      17
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      18
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      19
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      20
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      21
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      22
      screenshot_data
      23
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      24
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      25
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      26
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      27
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      28
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      29
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      30
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      31
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      __currentLoopData
      33
      category
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      38
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      author
      40
      i
      41
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      42
      rating
      43
      bar_length
    • frontend::inc.item (resources/views/vendor/frontend/inc/item.blade.php)44blade
      Params
      0
      __env
      1
      app
      2
      ad
      3
      settings
      4
      categories
      5
      platforms
      6
      footer_pages
      7
      popular_apps
      8
      locale_tags
      9
      editors_choice
      10
      languages
      11
      language_prefix
      12
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      13
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      14
      language_name
      15
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      16
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      17
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      18
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      19
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      20
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      22
      screenshot_data
      23
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      24
      platform_name
      25
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      26
      schema_data
      27
      breadcrumb_schema_data
      28
      other_apps_category
      29
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      30
      app_languages
      31
      head_type
      32
      __currentLoopData
      33
      category
      34
      loop
      35
      platform
      36
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      38
      book
      39
      author
      40
      i
      41
      total_rating
      42
      rating
      43
      bar_length
    • frontend::inc.item (resources/views/vendor/frontend/inc/item.blade.php)44blade
      Params
      0
      __env
      1
      app
      2
      ad
      3
      settings
      4
      categories
      5
      platforms
      6
      footer_pages
      7
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      8
      locale_tags
      9
      editors_choice
      10
      languages
      11
      language_prefix
      12
      language_icon_code
      13
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      14
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      15
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      16
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      17
      slug
      18
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      19
      app_query
      20
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      21
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      22
      screenshot_data
      23
      category_name
      24
      platform_name
      25
      h1_title
      26
      schema_data
      27
      breadcrumb_schema_data
      28
      other_apps_category
      29
      other_apps_platform
      30
      app_languages
      31
      head_type
      32
      __currentLoopData
      33
      category
      34
      loop
      35
      platform
      36
      ttt
      37
      t2
      38
      book
      39
      author
      40
      i
      41
      total_rating
      42
      rating
      43
      bar_length
    • frontend::inc.item (resources/views/vendor/frontend/inc/item.blade.php)44blade
      Params
      0
      __env
      1
      app
      2
      ad
      3
      settings
      4
      categories
      5
      platforms
      6
      footer_pages
      7
      popular_apps
      8
      locale_tags
      9
      editors_choice
      10
      languages
      11
      language_prefix
      12
      language_icon_code
      13
      menu_language_prefix
      14
      language_name
      15
      language_code
      16
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      17
      slug
      18
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      19
      app_query
      20
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      21
      app_comments
      22
      screenshot_data
      23
      category_name
      24
      platform_name
      25
      h1_title
      26
      schema_data
      27
      breadcrumb_schema_data
      28
      other_apps_category
      29
      other_apps_platform
      30
      app_languages
      31
      head_type
      32
      __currentLoopData
      33
      category
      34
      loop
      35
      platform
      36
      ttt
      37
      t2
      38
      book
      39
      author
      40
      i
      41
      total_rating
      42
      rating
      43
      bar_length
    • frontend::inc.partials (resources/views/vendor/frontend/inc/partials.blade.php)45blade
      Params
      0
      __env
      1
      app
      2
      ad
      3
      settings
      4
      categories
      5
      platforms
      6
      footer_pages
      7
      popular_apps
      8
      locale_tags
      9
      editors_choice
      10
      languages
      11
      language_prefix
      12
      language_icon_code
      13
      menu_language_prefix
      14
      language_name
      15
      language_code
      16
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      17
      slug
      18
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      19
      app_query
      20
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      21
      app_comments
      22
      screenshot_data
      23
      category_name
      24
      platform_name
      25
      h1_title
      26
      schema_data
      27
      breadcrumb_schema_data
      28
      other_apps_category
      29
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      30
      app_languages
      31
      head_type
      32
      __currentLoopData
      33
      category
      34
      loop
      35
      platform
      36
      ttt
      37
      t2
      38
      book
      39
      author
      40
      i
      41
      total_rating
      42
      rating
      43
      bar_length
      44
      type
    • frontend::inc.item_small (resources/views/vendor/frontend/inc/item_small.blade.php)45blade
      Params
      0
      __env
      1
      app
      2
      ad
      3
      settings
      4
      categories
      5
      platforms
      6
      footer_pages
      7
      popular_apps
      8
      locale_tags
      9
      editors_choice
      10
      languages
      11
      language_prefix
      12
      language_icon_code
      13
      menu_language_prefix
      14
      language_name
      15
      language_code
      16
      localBusiness
      17
      slug
      18
      errors
      19
      app_query
      20
      comment_order
      21
      app_comments
      22
      screenshot_data
      23
      category_name
      24
      platform_name
      25
      h1_title
      26
      schema_data
      27
      breadcrumb_schema_data
      28
      other_apps_category
      29
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      30
      app_languages
      31
      head_type
      32
      __currentLoopData
      33
      category
      34
      loop
      35
      platform
      36
      ttt
      37
      t2
      38
      book
      39
      author
      40
      i
      41
      total_rating
      42
      rating
      43
      bar_length
      44
      type
    • frontend::inc.item_small (resources/views/vendor/frontend/inc/item_small.blade.php)45blade
      Params
      0
      __env
      1
      app
      2
      ad
      3
      settings
      4
      categories
      5
      platforms
      6
      footer_pages
      7
      popular_apps
      8
      locale_tags
      9
      editors_choice
      10
      languages
      11
      language_prefix
      12
      language_icon_code
      13
      menu_language_prefix
      14
      language_name
      15
      language_code
      16
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      17
      slug
      18
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      19
      app_query
      20
      comment_order
      21
      app_comments
      22
      screenshot_data
      23
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      24
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      25
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      26
      schema_data
      27
      breadcrumb_schema_data
      28
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      29
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      30
      app_languages
      31
      head_type
      32
      __currentLoopData
      33
      category
      34
      loop
      35
      platform
      36
      ttt
      37
      t2
      38
      book
      39
      author
      40
      i
      41
      total_rating
      42
      rating
      43
      bar_length
      44
      type
    • frontend::inc.item_small (resources/views/vendor/frontend/inc/item_small.blade.php)45blade
      Params
      0
      __env
      1
      app
      2
      ad
      3
      settings
      4
      categories
      5
      platforms
      6
      footer_pages
      7
      popular_apps
      8
      locale_tags
      9
      editors_choice
      10
      languages
      11
      language_prefix
      12
      language_icon_code
      13
      menu_language_prefix
      14
      language_name
      15
      language_code
      16
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      17
      slug
      18
      errors
      19
      app_query
      20
      comment_order
      21
      app_comments
      22
      screenshot_data
      23
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      24
      platform_name
      25
      h1_title
      26
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      27
      breadcrumb_schema_data
      28
      other_apps_category
      29
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      30
      app_languages
      31
      head_type
      32
      __currentLoopData
      33
      category
      34
      loop
      35
      platform
      36
      ttt
      37
      t2
      38
      book
      39
      author
      40
      i
      41
      total_rating
      42
      rating
      43
      bar_length
      44
      type
    • frontend::inc.item_small (resources/views/vendor/frontend/inc/item_small.blade.php)45blade
      Params
      0
      __env
      1
      app
      2
      ad
      3
      settings
      4
      categories
      5
      platforms
      6
      footer_pages
      7
      popular_apps
      8
      locale_tags
      9
      editors_choice
      10
      languages
      11
      language_prefix
      12
      language_icon_code
      13
      menu_language_prefix
      14
      language_name
      15
      language_code
      16
      localBusiness
      17
      slug
      18
      errors
      19
      app_query
      20
      comment_order
      21
      app_comments
      22
      screenshot_data
      23
      category_name
      24
      platform_name
      25
      h1_title
      26
      schema_data
      27
      breadcrumb_schema_data
      28
      other_apps_category
      29
      other_apps_platform
      30
      app_languages
      31
      head_type
      32
      __currentLoopData
      33
      category
      34
      loop
      35
      platform
      36
      ttt
      37
      t2
      38
      book
      39
      author
      40
      i
      41
      total_rating
      42
      rating
      43
      bar_length
      44
      type
    • frontend::inc.item_small (resources/views/vendor/frontend/inc/item_small.blade.php)45blade
      Params
      0
      __env
      1
      app
      2
      ad
      3
      settings
      4
      categories
      5
      platforms
      6
      footer_pages
      7
      popular_apps
      8
      locale_tags
      9
      editors_choice
      10
      languages
      11
      language_prefix
      12
      language_icon_code
      13
      menu_language_prefix
      14
      language_name
      15
      language_code
      16
      localBusiness
      17
      slug
      18
      errors
      19
      app_query
      20
      comment_order
      21
      app_comments
      22
      screenshot_data
      23
      category_name
      24
      platform_name
      25
      h1_title
      26
      schema_data
      27
      breadcrumb_schema_data
      28
      other_apps_category
      29
      other_apps_platform
      30
      app_languages
      31
      head_type
      32
      __currentLoopData
      33
      category
      34
      loop
      35
      platform
      36
      ttt
      37
      t2
      38
      book
      39
      author
      40
      i
      41
      total_rating
      42
      rating
      43
      bar_length
      44
      type
    • frontend::inc.item_small (resources/views/vendor/frontend/inc/item_small.blade.php)45blade
      Params
      0
      __env
      1
      app
      2
      ad
      3
      settings
      4
      categories
      5
      platforms
      6
      footer_pages
      7
      popular_apps
      8
      locale_tags
      9
      editors_choice
      10
      languages
      11
      language_prefix
      12
      language_icon_code
      13
      menu_language_prefix
      14
      language_name
      15
      language_code
      16
      localBusiness
      17
      slug
      18
      errors
      19
      app_query
      20
      comment_order
      21
      app_comments
      22
      screenshot_data
      23
      category_name
      24
      platform_name
      25
      h1_title
      26
      schema_data
      27
      breadcrumb_schema_data
      28
      other_apps_category
      29
      other_apps_platform
      30
      app_languages
      31
      head_type
      32
      __currentLoopData
      33
      category
      34
      loop
      35
      platform
      36
      ttt
      37
      t2
      38
      book
      39
      author
      40
      i
      41
      total_rating
      42
      rating
      43
      bar_length
      44
      type
    • frontend::inc.item_small (resources/views/vendor/frontend/inc/item_small.blade.php)45blade
      Params
      0
      __env
      1
      app
      2
      ad
      3
      settings
      4
      categories
      5
      platforms
      6
      footer_pages
      7
      popular_apps
      8
      locale_tags
      9
      editors_choice
      10
      languages
      11
      language_prefix
      12
      language_icon_code
      13
      menu_language_prefix
      14
      language_name
      15
      language_code
      16
      localBusiness
      17
      slug
      18
      errors
      19
      app_query
      20
      comment_order
      21
      app_comments
      22
      screenshot_data
      23
      category_name
      24
      platform_name
      25
      h1_title
      26
      schema_data
      27
      breadcrumb_schema_data
      28
      other_apps_category
      29
      other_apps_platform
      30
      app_languages
      31
      head_type
      32
      __currentLoopData
      33
      category
      34
      loop
      35
      platform
      36
      ttt
      37
      t2
      38
      book
      39
      author
      40
      i
      41
      total_rating
      42
      rating
      43
      bar_length
      44
      type
    • frontend::inc.item_small (resources/views/vendor/frontend/inc/item_small.blade.php)45blade
      Params
      0
      __env
      1
      app
      2
      ad
      3
      settings
      4
      categories
      5
      platforms
      6
      footer_pages
      7
      popular_apps
      8
      locale_tags
      9
      editors_choice
      10
      languages
      11
      language_prefix
      12
      language_icon_code
      13
      menu_language_prefix
      14
      language_name
      15
      language_code
      16
      localBusiness
      17
      slug
      18
      errors
      19
      app_query
      20
      comment_order
      21
      app_comments
      22
      screenshot_data
      23
      category_name
      24
      platform_name
      25
      h1_title
      26
      schema_data
      27
      breadcrumb_schema_data
      28
      other_apps_category
      29
      other_apps_platform
      30
      app_languages
      31
      head_type
      32
      __currentLoopData
      33
      category
      34
      loop
      35
      platform
      36
      ttt
      37
      t2
      38
      book
      39
      author
      40
      i
      41
      total_rating
      42
      rating
      43
      bar_length
      44
      type
    • frontend::inc.item_small (resources/views/vendor/frontend/inc/item_small.blade.php)45blade
      Params
      0
      __env
      1
      app
      2
      ad
      3
      settings
      4
      categories
      5
      platforms
      6
      footer_pages
      7
      popular_apps
      8
      locale_tags
      9
      editors_choice
      10
      languages
      11
      language_prefix
      12
      language_icon_code
      13
      menu_language_prefix
      14
      language_name
      15
      language_code
      16
      localBusiness
      17
      slug
      18
      errors
      19
      app_query
      20
      comment_order
      21
      app_comments
      22
      screenshot_data
      23
      category_name
      24
      platform_name
      25
      h1_title
      26
      schema_data
      27
      breadcrumb_schema_data
      28
      other_apps_category
      29
      other_apps_platform
      30
      app_languages
      31
      head_type
      32
      __currentLoopData
      33
      category
      34
      loop
      35
      platform
      36
      ttt
      37
      t2
      38
      book
      39
      author
      40
      i
      41
      total_rating
      42
      rating
      43
      bar_length
      44
      type
    • frontend::inc.item_small (resources/views/vendor/frontend/inc/item_small.blade.php)45blade
      Params
      0
      __env
      1
      app
      2
      ad
      3
      settings
      4
      categories
      5
      platforms
      6
      footer_pages
      7
      popular_apps
      8
      locale_tags
      9
      editors_choice
      10
      languages
      11
      language_prefix
      12
      language_icon_code
      13
      menu_language_prefix
      14
      language_name
      15
      language_code
      16
      localBusiness
      17
      slug
      18
      errors
      19
      app_query
      20
      comment_order
      21
      app_comments
      22
      screenshot_data
      23
      category_name
      24
      platform_name
      25
      h1_title
      26
      schema_data
      27
      breadcrumb_schema_data
      28
      other_apps_category
      29
      other_apps_platform
      30
      app_languages
      31
      head_type
      32
      __currentLoopData
      33
      category
      34
      loop
      35
      platform
      36
      ttt
      37
      t2
      38
      book
      39
      author
      40
      i
      41
      total_rating
      42
      rating
      43
      bar_length
      44
      type
    • frontend::inc.partials (resources/views/vendor/frontend/inc/partials.blade.php)45blade
      Params
      0
      __env
      1
      app
      2
      ad
      3
      settings
      4
      categories
      5
      platforms
      6
      footer_pages
      7
      popular_apps
      8
      locale_tags
      9
      editors_choice
      10
      languages
      11
      language_prefix
      12
      language_icon_code
      13
      menu_language_prefix
      14
      language_name
      15
      language_code
      16
      localBusiness
      17
      slug
      18
      errors
      19
      app_query
      20
      comment_order
      21
      app_comments
      22
      screenshot_data
      23
      category_name
      24
      platform_name
      25
      h1_title
      26
      schema_data
      27
      breadcrumb_schema_data
      28
      other_apps_category
      29
      other_apps_platform
      30
      app_languages
      31
      head_type
      32
      __currentLoopData
      33
      category
      34
      loop
      35
      platform
      36
      ttt
      37
      t2
      38
      book
      39
      author
      40
      i
      41
      total_rating
      42
      rating
      43
      bar_length
      44
      type
    • frontend::inc.partials (resources/views/vendor/frontend/inc/partials.blade.php)45blade
      Params
      0
      __env
      1
      app
      2
      ad
      3
      settings
      4
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      6.8ms/app/Http/Controllers/SiteController.php:433quotesw_db
      Metadata
      Bindings
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      Backtrace
      • 15. /app/Http/Controllers/SiteController.php:433
      • 16. /vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Routing/Controller.php:54
      • 17. /vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Routing/ControllerDispatcher.php:45
      • 18. /vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Routing/Route.php:261
      • 19. /vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Routing/Route.php:205
    • select `translations`.`id`, `translations`.`code`, `translations`.`language` from `applications` left join `app_translations` on `applications`.`id` = `app_translations`.`app_id` left join `translations` on `app_translations`.`lang_id` = `translations`.`id` where `applications`.`slug` = 'back-in-the-autumn-i-had-awakened-to-a-growing-darkness-and-cacophony-as-if'
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      Metadata
      Bindings
      • 0. back-in-the-autumn-i-had-awakened-to-a-growing-darkness-and-cacophony-as-if
      Backtrace
      • 14. /app/helpers.php:25
      • 16. /vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Routing/Controller.php:54
      • 17. /vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Routing/ControllerDispatcher.php:45
      • 18. /vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Routing/Route.php:261
      • 19. /vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Routing/Route.php:205
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      1.12ms/app/Http/Controllers/SiteController.php:456quotesw_db
      Metadata
      Bindings
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      • 12. /app/Http/Controllers/SiteController.php:456
      • 13. /vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Routing/Controller.php:54
      • 14. /vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Routing/ControllerDispatcher.php:45
      • 15. /vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Routing/Route.php:261
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      880μs/app/Http/Controllers/SiteController.php:459quotesw_db
      Metadata
      Bindings
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      Backtrace
      • 12. /app/Http/Controllers/SiteController.php:459
      • 13. /vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Routing/Controller.php:54
      • 14. /vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Routing/ControllerDispatcher.php:45
      • 15. /vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Routing/Route.php:261
      • 16. /vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Routing/Route.php:205
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      Metadata
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      • 0. 57016
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      • 19. /app/Http/Controllers/SiteController.php:489
      • 20. /vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Routing/Controller.php:54
      • 21. /vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Routing/ControllerDispatcher.php:45
      • 22. /vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Routing/Route.php:261
      • 23. /vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Routing/Route.php:205
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      1.08ms/app/Http/Controllers/SiteController.php:492quotesw_db
      Metadata
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      Backtrace
      • 14. /app/Http/Controllers/SiteController.php:492
      • 15. /vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Routing/Controller.php:54
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      970μs/app/Http/Controllers/SiteController.php:496quotesw_db
      Metadata
      Bindings
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      Backtrace
      • 14. /app/Http/Controllers/SiteController.php:496
      • 15. /vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Routing/Controller.php:54
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      • 18. /vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Routing/Route.php:205
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      3.61ms/app/Http/Controllers/SiteController.php:657quotesw_db
      Metadata
      Backtrace
      • 11. /app/Http/Controllers/SiteController.php:657
      • 12. /vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Routing/Controller.php:54
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      1.05ms/app/Http/Controllers/SiteController.php:660quotesw_db
      Metadata
      Backtrace
      • 11. /app/Http/Controllers/SiteController.php:660
      • 12. /vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Routing/Controller.php:54
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      Metadata
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      • 15. /vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Routing/Controller.php:54
      • 16. /vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Routing/ControllerDispatcher.php:45
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