Before they had kids, if asked to conjure images of parenthood they would have said things like Reading in bed, and Giving a bath, and Running while holding the seat of a bicycle. Parenthood contains such moments of warmth and intimacy, but isn't them. It's cleaning up. The great bulk of family life involves no exchange of love, and no meaning, only fulfillment. Not the fulfillment of feeling fulfilled, but of fulfilling that which now falls to you.
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Before becoming parents, individuals often envision the tender moments that characterize family life, such as reading bedtime stories, taking baths with their children, or running alongside a bike. These joyful images create an idealized picture of parenthood filled with love and connection. However, reality is often much more mundane and involves many routine tasks that do not reflect profound emotional exchanges.

In reality, much of parenting consists of practical responsibilities and obligations that require attention and effort without the warmth of shared affection. The day-to-day activities may lack a sense of personal fulfillment, focusing instead on completing necessary chores that come with the role of a parent. This fulfillment doesn’t stem from personal satisfaction but from the commitment to care for and meet the needs of the family, highlighting a more grounded and less romanticized view of parenthood.

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February 21, 2025

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