The narrator reflects on the challenges of adapting to a new school environment, suggesting that the intensity of Ault School is a significant change from their junior high experience. They grapple with feelings of inadequacy, pondering whether the difficulty of their studies is making them feel less intelligent or if their perception of themselves has shifted. This self-doubt is compounded by a sense of loss; they no longer possess the confidence that once made them feel recognized and valued by teachers.
This idea of having "lost the glow" serves as a poignant metaphor for their diminished self-esteem. The glow represented the approval and acknowledgment from educators, stemming from their previous successes in class and exams. The narrator's longing for that affirmation highlights the emotional struggle of navigating new academic pressures, reflecting a universal theme of growing up and dealing with the challenges of fitting in and performing in a competitive environment.