He feels as if he is floating, and she is weighting him to earth; he would like to put his arms around her and his face in her apron, and rest there listening to her heartbeat. But he doesn't want to mess her up, get blood all down the front of her.
The character expresses a sense of ethereal detachment, as if he is hovering above his surroundings. In contrast, the woman represents a grounding force, a tether that connects him to reality. His desire to embrace her signifies a deep yearning for intimacy and comfort, as he seeks solace in her presence. However, he harbors concerns about tainting this connection, fearing that his emotional turmoil and scars might mar her purity and grace.
This conflict reveals the complexity of human relationships, where vulnerability and the need for connection often clash with the fear of causing harm to those we care about. The imagery of resting against her while listening to her heartbeat symbolizes a longing for safety and reassurance, highlighting the fragility of their bond. Overall, this passage captures the tension between the longing for closeness and the apprehension of emotional fallout.
