The speaker reflects on their insecurities and feelings of inadequacy regarding their attractiveness and intellect, wishing for a more striking physical appearance and the ability to engage in stimulating political discussions to catch Constantin's interest. They ponder the possibility that these attributes might make them more appealing and significant in the eyes of others, particularly to someone they desire.

As the speaker contemplates their relationship with Constantin, they express a fear that once he develops feelings for them, his allure might fade into the mundane. This concern ties into a broader theme of how romantic relationships often shift dynamics, leading to disillusionment or disappointment, reminiscent of past experiences with other men like Buddy Willard. The complexity of attraction and genuine connection weighs heavily on the speaker's mind.