In Margaret Atwood's "The Handmaid's Tale," the protagonist is consumed by nostalgia for a time before the oppressive regime took control of society. She longs for the past and the sense of normalcy that has been stripped away from her life, but she realizes that such desires are futile. The deep yearning for the return of what once was highlights the emotional turmoil faced by individuals in a repressive environment.

This quote reflects the broader theme of loss and the struggle to cope with the changes enforced by Gilead. It underscores the inner conflict between the desire for a return to former freedoms and the acceptance of a new reality where such aspirations seem increasingly impossible. Ultimately, the protagonist's journey exemplifies the human condition's endurance in the face of profound change.