In Denis Johnson's "Jesus' Son," the narrator expresses a deep internal struggle, likening himself to a "whimpering dog," indicating vulnerability and despair. His search for employment is influenced by societal expectations rather than personal fulfillment, highlighting a sense of disconnection from his true feelings. He feels compelled to conform to the belief that having a job equates to happiness, influenced by those around him.
This internal conflict reveals the narrator's lack of genuine contentment as he navigates life under the weight of external pressures. While he initially believes that finding work will lead to happiness, he grapples with the realization that fulfillment cannot solely come from meeting others' expectations. The story captures the complexities of identity and the struggle for authenticity in a world that often imposes its standards on individuals.