The narrator reveals a deep fascination with Edward, a character shrouded in mystery. This obsession leads to a sense of confusion, as the narrator acknowledges a lack of rational thought regarding their desire to remain in Forks. Instead of wanting to leave the unsettling environment, the pull toward Edward grows stronger.

Despite recognizing the potential danger of this fixation, the narrator feels conflicted. It hints at an emotional turmoil fueled by curiosity and attraction, pointing to the complexity of their feelings. The emphasis on being "stupid" suggests an awareness of the irrationality of their obsession and a struggle between logic and desire.