According to Lewis Carroll in Eight or Nine Wise Words about Letter-Writing, conflicts and friendships depend on how much effort each party is willing to invest. When people are cautious and hesitant in disagreements, avoiding getting too involved, they are less likely to escalate conflicts. On the other hand, when everyone is more open to making peace and bridging differences, reconciliation becomes more common.

He illustrates that if each side in a quarrel is willing to only go a small distance to resolve issues (less than half), while in friendships they are willing to go well beyond the midpoint, then peaceful resolutions and reconciliation will outnumber disputes. The idea emphasizes the importance of mutual effort and goodwill in maintaining harmony and resolving disagreements.