It gave me a feeling of temporary acceptance into that elite community, to stroll across the quad at his side. It also gave me my first faint quiver of sexual belonging, the elusive feeling that if I slipped my hand into his as we walked along, a door would fall open somewhere in the long wall of reality as I knew it, never to be closed again.
The narrator reflects on a moment of connection with someone from an elite group, emphasizing how walking together on campus made her feel temporarily accepted. This experience highlights her desire to belong to a community that seems both exclusive and alluring, igniting a sense of intimacy and connection with the other person.
This encounter also sparks in her a glimpse of sexual belonging, suggesting a deeper yearning for emotional and physical closeness. The imagery of holding hands symbolizes a transformative potential, where this simple act could lead to profound changes in her understanding of herself and her place in the world.
