It haunted him all night, while he slept alone; it was still there in the morning, when he swallowed his coffee and backed down the driveway in the crumpled old Ford. And riding to work, one of the youngest and healthiest passengers on the train, he sat with the look of a man condemned to a very slow, painless death. He felt middle-aged.

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The protagonist is deeply affected by a lingering thought that torments him throughout the night, leaving him restless and alone. As he begins his day, this haunting feeling remains with him, impacting his mundane morning routine. Even in the simplicity of drinking coffee and getting ready for work, he carries this heavy emotional burden.

On his commute, the contrast between his physical youth and vibrant health versus his internal despair is striking. Despite being surrounded by life and energy, he feels as though he is slowly fading away, experiencing a sense of resignation about his existence that feels all too familiar. This sense of being "condemned" suggests a profound disillusionment with his life, marking him as someone who feels far older than his years.

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March 25, 2025

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