In "Becoming," Michelle Obama reflects on her hopes for her children to grow up resilient and independent, emphasizing the importance of not conforming to traditional patriarchal values. She articulates a desire for her daughters to develop a strong sense of self, free from the constraints of outdated gender roles. This perspective challenges the notion that a woman's life revolves around a man's presence.

Obama highlights her commitment to fostering a family dynamic where her children thrive on their own terms. By choosing not to wait for their father's arrival, she instills in them the belief that they do not need to define their lives around him. This approach encourages them to be proactive and fulfilled individuals, asserting their own identities in the world.