Knowing this secret, being the only one chosen to know, makes me feel important in a way. But it's a negative importance, it's the importance of a blank sheet of paper. I can know because I don't count. I feel singled out, but also bereft.
The narrator in Margaret Atwood's "Cat's Eye" expresses a complex feeling about being privy to a secret that no one else knows. This awareness brings a sense of significance, yet it’s tinged with negativity. The narrator likens this importance to that of a blank sheet of paper, suggesting a profound emptiness or insignificance, where their knowledge doesn’t translate into real value or recognition.
This duality of feeling both elevated and isolated is palpable. The narrator feels specially chosen to hold a secret but grapples with the realization that this distinction also highlights their loneliness. The sense of being alone with this knowledge heightens their sense of being insignificant, creating a bittersweet emotional landscape where importance is linked to exclusion rather than belonging.