My life seems too fast now, so obstructions bother me less than they once did. I am no longer in a hurry to see what is around the next bend. I find myself wanting to backferry, to hover midstream, suspended. If I could do that, I might avoid many things: harsh words, foolish decisions, moments of inattention, regrets that wash over me, like water. {196}
In this reflection, the author Anne Fadiman expresses a shift in her perspective regarding the pace of life. She acknowledges that life feels rapid, prompting her to be less affected by obstacles than in the past. This newfound attitude signifies a maturity and acceptance that allows her to take things in stride rather than rushing through experiences.
Fadiman yearns for a state of pause, wishing she could linger in the moment rather than anxiously looking ahead. This desire suggests a wish to escape from potential negative experiences such as harsh interactions or rash decisions. By wanting to "backferry," she highlights the importance of reflection and mindfulness to avoid future regrets, likening these regrets to water that can overwhelm if not managed carefully.
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