No mistakes, I'd promised myself that i would make no mistakes, no matter how minimal they seemed. if i held her hand, i would only want more - another insignificant touch, another move closer to her. i could feel that. a new kind of desire was growing in me, working to override my self-control. no mistakes.
The narrator reflects on a strong internal resolve to avoid making mistakes, emphasizing their determination to maintain control over their actions. Despite this commitment, the presence of another person stirs a potent new desire that challenges their self-restraint. The urge for physical closeness becomes increasingly hard to ignore, creating a tension between their promises and natural feelings.
The struggle is palpable as the narrator acknowledges the attraction toward this person, recognizing that even a small gesture, like holding hands, could lead to deeper emotions and temptations. This conflict illustrates the difficulty of adhering to one's principles when faced with powerful desires that threaten to overpower rational thought.
