Nor did Anders remember seeing a woman leap to her death from the building opposite his own just days after his daughter was born. He did not remember shouting, "Lord have mercy!" He did not remember deliberately crashing his father's car in to a tree, of having his ribs kicked in by threepolicemen at an anti-war rally, or waking himself up with laughter. He did not remember when he began to regard the heap of books on his desk with boredom and dread, or when he grew angry at writers for writing them. He did not remember when everything began to remind him of something else.
Anders is plagued by unsettling memories that seem to escape him. He struggles to recall specific events, such as a tragic incident he witnessed shortly after his daughter's birth or his own reckless actions like crashing his father's car. These omissions highlight a deeper disconnection in Anders' life, suggesting he is experiencing a profound sense of lost time and memory.
As he reflects on these moments, he finds himself increasingly detached from the once-enjoyed books on his desk, feeling instead a blend of boredom and frustration towards the writers who create them. This shift in perception underscores Anders' internal turmoil and a growing resentment, as everything around him starts to evoke feelings of nostalgia or melancholy, further isolating him from the world he used to engage with.
