People entering the bars on First Avenue gave up their bodies. Then only the demons inhabiting us could be seen. Souls who had wronged each other were brought together here. The rapist met his victim, the jilted child discovered its mother. But nothing could be healed, the mirror was a knife dividing everything from itself, tears of false fellowship dripped on the bar. And what are you going to do to me now? With what, exactly, would you expect to frighten me?
by Denis Johnson
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In the bars of First Avenue, individuals surrender themselves, revealing not just their physical forms but also the darker aspects of their souls. This place acts as a meeting ground for those who have caused each other pain, allowing rapists to confront their victims and jilted children to face neglectful parents. However, this confrontation does not bring healing. Instead, it serves as a painful reflection of their shared traumas, underscoring a sense of division that cuts deeper than the superficial connections formed in their suffering.

As these haunted souls grapple with their pasts, they are left in an existential quandary, questioning what could possibly scare them further. Their experiences create a sense of desensitization, where the usual fears fade away in the face of their haunting realities. The atmosphere is thick with despair and camaraderie, yet it remains unfulfilling and painful, with tears that symbolize a hollow sense of connection. Denis Johnson captures this complex interplay of pain and the longing for resolution, but ultimately reveals the futility of their endeavors.

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February 22, 2025

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