So much of college is girls labeling other girls terrible things when they don't like their behavior, but using concerned language so they have plausible deniability is they get accused of being bitches: That girl is not cheerfully doing what the rest of us are doing, so she is probably 'depressed' or 'has an eating disorder' or 'is weird with guys,' and so on.
Mindy Kaling, in her book "Why Not Me?", highlights a troubling trend among college girls who often judge their peers harshly. When a girl doesn't conform to the social norms or behaviors expected by others, she may be labeled negatively. Instead of calling out their peers directly, they cloak their judgments in language that sounds caring, creating an illusion of concern while avoiding the label of being unkind.
Kaling points out that this behavior perpetuates a toxic environment where girls feel pressured to conform to group expectations. Instead of fostering genuine connections, these judgments lead to isolation, as individuals are pathologized for simply being different or not participating in the same social activities. This commentary underscores the complexities of female relationships in college and the need for more authenticity and empathy.
