So, now I shall talk every night. To myself. To the moon. I shall walk, as I did tonight, jealous of my loneliness, in the blue-silver of the cold moon, shining brilliantly on the drifts of fresh-fallen snow, with the myriad sparkles. I talk to myself and look at the dark trees, blessedly neutral. So much easier than facing people, than having to look happy, invulnerable, clever. With masks down, I walk, talking to the moon, to the neutral impersonal force that does not hear, but merely accepts my being. And does not smite me down.
The speaker reflects on their experience of solitude during nighttime walks, choosing to communicate with themselves and the moon rather than with others. In the beauty of the moonlight and the fresh snow, they find a sense of jealousy toward their own loneliness, as it provides a comfort that mingles with their thoughts. The cold, serene environment serves as a backdrop for introspection, allowing them to speak freely without the pressure of social expectations.
This internal dialogue with the moon symbolizes a longing for connection without the vulnerabilities that come from interacting with people. The speaker feels a sense of relief in addressing the moon, a neutral presence that does not judge or demand anything from them. This acceptance fosters a space where their true self can be revealed, without the facade maintained in the company of others. In this way, the moon becomes a confidant, offering solace in the chaos of human interaction.
