The protagonist feels a physical reaction, tension in his stomach, as he ascends the stairs. This discomfort stems from a complex relationship with hope, which he recognizes as both motivating and perilous. Hope suggests that any failure he might encounter would be entirely attributed to his own actions, intensifying the pressure he feels.
This insight reveals the burden of expectation that the character carries. The anticipation of positive outcomes can lead to profound anxiety, as he grapples with the high stakes of his aspirations and the potential for personal failure. Thus, hope transforms from a source of encouragement into a weighty challenge for him.