The quote reflects a deep sense of loss and a struggle with identity. The speaker reminisces about her childhood self, a little girl with blond hair who embodied innocence and happiness. However, the emotional weight of the memory is heavy, indicating that the speaker has moved on from that version of herself, feeling disconnected from the joy and simplicity of her youth.
This introspection reveals a profound conflict; while she acknowledges the positivity of her childhood persona, she also expresses disdain for those memories. This suggests that her past experiences may have led to pain or growth, making it difficult for her to embrace that simpler, happier time. The transformation from girlhood to adulthood often brings complexities that can overshadow the lightness of earlier years.