In this passage, the narrator reflects on his complex feelings toward William. Initially, he struggles to articulate love, feeling instead a deep sense of responsibility and protection for the boy. This responsibility manifests in a physical connection, as he cherishes William like a precious gem, frequently reaching out to feel that bond.
As he holds William, the narrator experiences a profound emotional shift. The tactile sensation of the boy's spine and the smell of his innocence evoke a powerful love within him, one that threatens to overwhelm him. This moment highlights the transition from mere duty to an intense, almost heartbreaking affection, illustrating the depth of their relationship.