We don't like to admit it," said Julian, "but the idea of losing control is one that fascinates controlled people such as ourselves more than anything. All truly civilized people - the ancients no less than us - have civilized themselves through the willful repression of the old, animal self. Are we, in this room, really very different from the Greeks and the Romans? Obsessed with duty, piety, loyalty, sacrifice? All those things which are to modern tastes so chilling?

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In "The Secret History," Julian explores the theme of control versus chaos, suggesting that those who are tightly regulated in their lives are often intrigued by the potential for losing that control. He posits that civilized societies have emerged from a collective effort to suppress their primal instincts, drawing a parallel between contemporary individuals and historical figures like the Greeks and Romans. This shared obsession with themes like duty and sacrifice highlights the complexity of human nature and the internal struggles faced across different eras.

Julian's reflection raises questions about the nature of civilization and the lengths people go to repress their more instinctual sides. By acknowledging the allure of chaos for those entrenched in order, he invites contemplation on the cost of civility and the often hidden desires lurking beneath the surface. This dynamic between control and the desire for freedom is foundational to understanding personal and societal conflict, bridging the gap between past and present human experiences.

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February 07, 2025

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