In "Drums of Autumn" by Diana Gabaldon, the narrative reflects on John Grey's deep sense of loss after the death of his wife, highlighting the emotional struggle he faces. The permanence of her absence weighs heavily on him, regardless of their relationship dynamics. This profound sorrow is further complicated by the courage he demonstrated in ensuring the welfare of his son, William, by sending him to be with Jamie.

The circumstances are challenging, as John must manage his grief while dealing with various responsibilities and unexpected events, such as William catching measles. The mention of "bloody man" shows Grey's frustration in his situation, indicating the trials he endures while trying to navigate his personal pain and parental duties. This blend of resilience and hardship underlines the themes of sacrifice and sorrow throughout the story.