What was she to say? The prodigal has returned? The mutineer wishes to be reinstated? The subordinate, having gone to a great deal of trouble to prove her commander wrong, has come back and promises to be a good little subordinate hereafter, or at least until next time?
The protagonist grapples with complex feelings upon returning to her former environment. She reflects on how to describe her return, unsure of whether to frame it as a reconciliation or an admission of defeat. The burden of her past actions weighs heavily on her, creating a tension between her desire to be accepted and her struggles with authority.
Ultimately, her uncertainty highlights the dynamics of power and loyalty, as she contemplates her role now that she has challenged her commander. This internal conflict illustrates her growth and the shifting nature of her allegiance, framing her return within the larger themes of identity and belonging in "The Blue Sword."