The narrator reflects on his tendency to fixate on potential failure rather than fully enjoying the moment, revealing a struggle with self-consciousness. This preoccupation distracts him from simply experiencing life and diminishes his enjoyment. He recognizes that this mindset indicates that he feels lost, suggesting that overthinking can be detrimental to personal experiences.
Moreover, he preoccupies himself with thoughts about how others perceive him, highlighting a deep-seated insecurity. The mention of his physical reaction serves to illustrate his vulnerability and anxiety, indicating that such self-awareness can hinder genuine connection and pleasure, further intensifying his feelings of inadequacy.