The narrator expresses frustration and self-doubt about becoming a successful writer, comparing herself to renowned authors like Norman Mailer and F. Scott Fitzgerald. She grapples with the pressure to prove herself and questions the value of writing if no one acknowledges her work. Her internal conflict is exacerbated by the success and support that other writers seem to enjoy, particularly contrasting her situation with those of L'il and Rainbow, who receive praise and encouragement.

This comparison leads her to wonder why she feels a constant need for validation and whether she truly has the talent to be a writer, reflecting her insecurities. She is torn between her aspirations and the fear of inadequacy, highlighting the struggles many face in the pursuit of art and recognition. The narrative captures the complexities of ambition intertwined with self-doubt in the creative journey.