Dark humor - Dual-Language Quotes That Speak to the Heart

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I'd die for your sins, but I'd probably enjoy them first — josh stern And That's Why...

"Stay in your boats," Dahra said. "We're still going to need food. Throw your fish onto the dock. I'll get Albert to send someone here to collect it. Then go back out, row up the coast a little ways, and camp out."

"Camp out?" Quinn echoed.

"Yes!"

"You're serious."

"No, it's my idea of a joke, Quinn," Dahra snapped. "Pookie just coughed up a lung and fell over dead. You understand what I'm saying? I mean he coughed his actual lungs out of his mouth." — Michael Grant Plague

"Of course they were eaten," he retorted, his eyes flashing in cold humour. "Trolls generally aren’t exactly renowned for being vegetarians." — Adele Rose

By four o'clock, I've discounted suicide in favor of killing everyone else in the entire world instead. — Warren Ellis Transmetropolitan,...

Now that, my friends, is what we vampires call a good exit. — Chloe Neill Twice Bitten

Eve: She told me last! Shane: Boyfriend! Michael: Landlord! Eve: Crap. Right. Next time you sell your soul to the devil, I get first contact! — Rachel Caine Midnight Alley

Quinn glanced at me. "Gonna make it?" "Yeah, yeah," I answered. "Though what's the point? Mom's going to kill us anyway." "True." "If that thing doesn't kill us first," I added when the stench of rot and mushrooms hit us. — Alyxandra Harvey Blood Moon

I dipped my head so I could look into his eyes. The monster at my table looked ready to cry. I'd managed to make a teenager depressed. Maybe I could shoot some fish in a barrel for an encore. — Ilona Andrews Magic Slays

If there is anything I can do, I'll help. Don't get excited. It's not because of you. For the child. If it wasn't for her and the flare, I'd throw your dumb ass out of this window. "What does the flare have to do with it?" "I don't want it to be attributed to a loss of control on my part. When I throw you out of the window, I want there to be no doubt the act was deliberate." — Ilona Andrews Magic Burns

It's just too bad they have to die. They're totally bangable, you know? Bangable, Taylor mouthed in disgust. She wanted to show this boy another meaning for the word bang, and it involved his head against a steel door. — Libba Bray Beauty Queens

"And then you rushed off afterward because of that business with the barber in Gleam Street." "Sweeney Jones," said Vimes. "Well, he was killing people, Sybil. The best you could say is that he didn't mean to. He was just very bad at shaving." — Terry Pratchett The building

I've committed to nothing...and that's just suicide...by tiny, tiny increments.

It all jibed, and the books would close on Jasper as death by misadventure. Unofficially, Eve labeled it death by stupidity, but there wasn't a place on the sheet for that particular observation. -...

Today Birthdays

1752 - Frances Burney 1865 - William Butler Yeats 1888 - Fernando Pessoa 1931 - Irvin D. Yalom 1937 - Eleanor Holmes Norton 1944 - Ban Ki-moon 1928 - John Forbes Nash, Jr. 1966 - Ben Horowitz 1962 - Hannah Storm 1969 - Laura Kightlinger 1926 - Paul Lynde 1986 - Kat Dennings 1990 - Aaron Taylor-Johnson 1894 - Jacques-Henri Lartigue

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If I turned towards books, it was because they were the only sanctuary I knew, one I needed in order...

We all had to pay, but not for the crimes we were accused of. There were other scores to settle.

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Why are they going to disappear him? I don't know. It doesn't make sense. It isn't even good...

Keep in mind that when we talk of a great painting we are not really talking about anything great....

Read me back the last line. 'Read me back the last line,' read back the corporal who could take...

the full fury of his storming countenance with its rugged overhang of gullied forehead and huge crag...

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