All drunks, particularly those who grew up in alcoholic homes, have that same sense of angst and trepidation, one that has no explainable origins. The fear is not necessarily self-centered, either. It's like watching someone point a revolver at his temple while he cocks and dry-fires the mechanism, over and over again, until the cylinder rotates a loaded chamber into firing position.
The quote reflects the deep-seated anxiety experienced by individuals raised in environments affected by alcoholism. It suggests that this profound sense of dread originates from an inexplicable source, likely tied to the chaotic experiences of their upbringing. The imagery of a person playing with a loaded gun symbolizes the constant danger and unpredictability associated with their reality, emphasizing the emotional turmoil faced by those who are accustomed to living in fear.
This metaphor extends beyond personal introspection, highlighting a broader sense of inevitable danger that accompanies such anxiety. It captures the complex relationships and mental struggles within families impacted by addiction. The repetitive action of cocking and dry-firing the weapon suggests a relentless cycle of tension and the looming threat of actual harm, making the emotional landscape often fraught with apprehension and uncertainty.