All reality about me now appeared to be in tatters, taken down and reduced to the civil war of its particles. I held on very, very tight indeed. Because in addition to that feeling, that disintegration, there was rage. I wanted to break something.
by Sebastian Faulks
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The protagonist experiences a profound sense of disarray in his life, feeling as though everything he once understood has crumbled around him. This overwhelming sensation of fragmentation leaves him feeling vulnerable and desperate, as he struggles to maintain his grip on reality amidst the chaos.

Alongside this turmoil, he also grapples with intense anger and a desire for destruction. The intersection of his internal disintegration and rage compels him to seek an outlet, emphasizing the emotional turmoil and conflict that define his current state of being.

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